From the other end of the leash

So, what makes the weeks so interesting and never the same? Partly it's what the dogs do, and you'll find out about that soon enough, but what about the walkers who are with them? I'm sure I'm not exposing any secrets with these stories but here's a sneak peak into what it's like in the world of walking from our end of the leash....

Common phrases we hear from the public when we are walking multiple dogs (and this can be anything from 2 to 6 dogs):

"Are they all yours?" (My answer is usually, haha, no that would be bonkers!)

"You've got your hands full there!"

"Wow!"

Controlling the dogs - there is a lot of technical stuff that goes into planning a dog walk when you do it as a profession. You have to consider the personalities of the dogs you are walking, the weather, the mood you are in and then the mood they show to be in on pick up. Once this is sussed out, deciding on where to walk happens and usually it's done in the hope we don't see anyone! I must admit, it's a bit of an antisocial job!

Toileting, and I'm talking human. Picture this, you are out all day, you are trying to stay hydrated which also means you are going to need the toilet, add in a few rubbish pelvic floor muscles and bam, when nature calls, you need to go and frustratingly this is rarely when we are picking up or dropping off a dog, its usually mid-walk. Thankfully, the majority of the places we walk have lots of bushes and places to wee in a discreet way, however being surrounded by up to 6 dogs because all of a sudden you are the most interesting thing going, being discreet goes out the window! You may as well stop and drop your knickers in the middle of a public footpath! TOP RECALL TIP, STOP FOR A WEE, THE DOG WILL SOON COME RUNNING!

Things that have happened when trying to take a sneaky wee:

• Being bowled over into some stingers by an incoming excited lab, ouch, sore bum!

• Being pee'd on by one of the dogs because we all know they love to wee in the same spot. Hmm, I can promise you I don't send peemails, or reply to my insta messages in this way buddy!

• Getting a full on snog because you're at that height and you can only move a certain distance to get away, I tell you, these labs take their chances where they can!

Stinky stuff. I think we can all agree this job is pretty horrid when a dog rolls in something stinky. But, having to put them back in the car after trying to give them a rub down when they have rolled at the beginning of the walk and its stuck on, all windows are open and you hope the smell dissipates from your nose before the next walk starts, is next level stinky stuff!

Even higher next level stinky stuff....it has been known for us to have encountered a dog that has rolled in what we can only think must have been human poo! Need I say more, other than eurgh, why!? And I say that to both the dog and the offending human!

But the piece de resistance, is when one of the dogs rolled in something so smelly that the walker was retching and actually ended up vomiting on the dog! Obviously, said dog was cleaned down well before being returned but these dogs do have a habit of doing things that our stomachs can't handle!

Back to something a little less stomach churning, is something I like to call 'Maypole Leads'. This, quite simply, is my phrase for what the leads look like when the dogs are having a great time sniffing (usually at the start of the walk) before any are off lead.

And finally, twisting, turning and stepping. No, this isn't a new dance craze, this is what we have to do to try and avoid maypole leads! Look out for the sneaky back hand cross over, and calculated lead drop to back of knee catch in order that we can continue to move forward with the dogs rather than being wrapped up and our feet swept from under of us!

And of course, as nasty as some of these things are, we still continue, smiling and laughing (sometimes hysterically) because you really can't write this stuff and if we were completely honest, most of it (really disgusting stuff aside), we wouldn't have any other way.

Maypole leads!